Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
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