Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Randomize