Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
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