Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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