This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
