Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize