i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
