So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
