My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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