ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
