I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
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My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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