Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
