i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Randomize
