): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I just googled if crying burns calories
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
