im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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