Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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