RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Randomize
