Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
