UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
