You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
