Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
