He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
