no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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