So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
sex in a hospital.. check
When are your genitals available?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
