What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
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I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
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I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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