try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
