I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
