Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
