carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize