I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
