Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
