They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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