Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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