i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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