i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize