Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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