I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
he told me I talked like a deaf person
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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