I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
