Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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