You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to coat check the pizza.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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