Apparently you make a good broom.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Randomize
