I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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