if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
