if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
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I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
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Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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