We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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