Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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