And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
