he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Randomize
