Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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