he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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