i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
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